I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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