I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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