All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
