when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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