I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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