Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
