I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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