her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
His hands were made for my vagina.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
