I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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