We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
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