The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
