butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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