i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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