I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Tornado booty call.. dedication
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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