Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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