Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
