I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
