At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
