i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
