i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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