Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
