just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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