Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
