Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
