But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
