Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
