So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
