you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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