i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
