I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
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