At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
