i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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