How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
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