the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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