Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
