also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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