Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
The adults are the big ones right?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
