Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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