Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
