the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
