you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
