Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Did you just see the Batmobile???
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
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