I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
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