I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Come back. Shots need mouths.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
