We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
