So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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