i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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