found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
