SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
