it hurts more in the daytime
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
